“What about me?” Alex asks. He says it jokingly, but I can tell he actually cares what I think. “How do I look?”

“You look okay,” I tell him. When the smile on his face falters, I say, “You look good.”

His face gets serious. “Kat, I just want you to know, no hard feelings.”

Huh?

He rubs the back of his neck. “I had a lot of fun with you this summer—and that night on the boat. But I get it. You weren’t into it. Probably wasn’t meant to be anyway, right?”

“Right.” I’m dazed. The only reason I didn’t keep after Alex was because I thought he liked Nadia. My pride—I just couldn’t take it. Now that I know it wasn’t the case, that he and Nadia were never a thing, maybe something could happen with us.

Alex heads back over to his table, where Lillia and the rest of his friends are. I feel a pang in my stomach. I tell myself it’s because I’m hungry.

Mary comes over. She doesn’t look me in the eye; she just stares at the food.

“Have a Dorito, Mary,” I say in a low voice. “Or a cupcake.”

Her head snaps up. “I’m too nervous to eat.” I see her looking around the room for Reeve. “Shouldn’t he be feeling it soon?”

I examine her, her thin wrists, the way her clavicle sticks out under her dress. It makes sense now, the fact that she never eats. This too must be Reeve’s fault. Eff him and his football scholarship. “Don’t worry,” I say, covering my mouth up with a chip so no one sees us talking. “It should be any minute now. All we have to do is sit back and watch.”

Mary nods and tries to smile. “I’m going to miss our secret midnight meetings.”

“Are you kidding? I keep falling asleep during first period. I can’t have that bringing down my GPA any more than it already has.” Not if I want to go to Oberlin next fall.

“I just hope we can figure out a way to still be friends.” Mary blinks rapidly. “You guys are all I have here.”

I hesitate. I don’t know how to answer her, because I don’t know myself. Yeah, Lillia and I are cool right now, but I’m not about to suddenly start wearing that friendship necklace tomorrow morning. But Mary’s looking at me with pleading eyes, and I don’t want to disappoint her, so I say, “Mary, don’t worry about that stuff tonight. Let’s just enjoy the show, okay? This is what you’ve been waiting for.” I have to talk a bit louder than I want, because of the clapping. I stand on my toes and look out to the dance floor. A circle is forming. I grin at Mary. “Follow me.”

I lead her to the center of the gym, right on the periphery of the crowd that has gathered around Reeve. Everyone’s clapping and giving him the floor. He’s flushed and sweating through his shirt; he’s unbuttoned the top buttons and loosened his tie. He is dancing his ass off, bopping around like an idiot. I can’t tell if it’s the ecstasy or if it’s just Reeve being Reeve.

Mary and I exchange a look.

I know for sure that it’s the E when Reeve starts to break-dance. He can’t break-dance for shit. I start to laugh. I laugh even harder when I see Rennie trying to get close to him, dancing sexy, but it doesn’t work because Reeve’s moves are too wild and jerky. Once, he almost punches her in the face. Rennie grabs him by the tie and pulls him closer to her, and then he takes the tie off and wraps it around his temple. It dangles as he dances away from her and grabs Mrs. Dumfee, who teaches chemistry and is about a hundred years old. She tries to protest, but he puts her arms around his neck and jumps up and down. She actually goes along with it, the old hag. Probably the most action she’s seen in, like, thirty years.

The DJ starts throwing props out into the crowd, feather boas and beach balls, cheesy stuff like that. Reeve runs up to the DJ table and grabs a pair of maracas and starts galloping around the dance floor like a prize pony, shaking the maracas above his head. I swear, he’s shaking them so hard, I half expect them to split and drop seeds all over the floor.

Reeve’s friends, Alex and PJ and those guys, are doubled over, cracking up. But when I glance over at Mary, she looks upset.

“He’s making such a fool of himself,” she says sadly.

I’m not sure why, but I feel like something’s slipping away.

“When is someone going to catch on? Maybe you should go get Senor Tremont.”

But then the music cuts off and the lights come on. Coach Christy is onstage in a red dress. It’s weird to see her dressed up. She usually wears gym shorts and a visor. Into the microphone she says, “Will Jar Island’s homecoming court please come to the stage?”

They file up onstage behind her. Rennie’s hanging on to Reeve like she can barely stand in her five-inch stripper heels. And from the way she’s smiling her cat-that-ate-the-canary smile, I know she thinks she has it in the bag. She takes the tie off Reeve’s head, puts it back around his neck, and straightens it. Of course Rennie wants the two of them to look picture perfect when they win.

I stand up straighter. This is my moment. I’d better enjoy it.

Coach Christy introduces everyone onstage, and then she opens up the cream-colored envelope in her hand with a flourish. “Jar Island’s homecoming king is . . . Reeve Tabatsky!”

Everyone screams and claps and stomps their feet like this is some big surprise. Coach Christy puts the crown on his head, and he is hamming it up, dancing around and moving his hands as if he’s holding glow sticks at a rave. He hugs Coach Christy with so much force that he lifts her into the air. She disentangles herself from him, smoothing down her dress and looking somewhat freaked out. She quickly says, “And your homecoming queen is . . . Lillia Cho!”

Oh, damn.

I don’t want to look at Mary, not after I told her it was cool, that I’d made sure Ashlin had enough votes to win. Honestly, I didn’t even think to count Lillia’s votes. I did see a bunch in there for her, but she’d said that she wasn’t going to be a factor, so I didn’t worry about it. Damn.

Maybe things will be okay. Rennie lost, and Reeve’s as high as a kite. This can still work.

Onstage, Rennie’s mouth is hanging open. She’s not even mad; she’s just confused. Like, there must be some mistake. And poor Lillia is looking out into the crowd like a dazed baby deer as Coach Christy puts the tiara on her head.

Reeve sprints over to her, grabs her, and practically throws her into the air.

“Shit,” I say.

CHAPTER THIRTY-SIX

LILLIA

IT WASN’T SUPPOSED TO BE ME. THIS ISN’T THE WAY IT was supposed to go down.

Ashlin is clapping. She doesn’t look disappointed, probably because she never ever thought she’d actually win. Rennie’s standing next to her, with this empty look on her face, this sad, empty look. Nadia rushes up to the edge of the stage, and she jumps up and down cheering for me and screaming my name. I reach up and touch the tiara on my head with a shaky hand.

Out of nowhere Reeve grabs me and lifts me into the air and spins me around like we’re ice-skaters. I shove him away from me and scream at him to put me down, but everyone is clapping and shouting so loudly, I don’t think he even hears me.

The rest of homecoming court comes down from the stage, Rennie last, and I’m left alone up here with Reeve. I search for Kat or Mary in the crowd, to try to find out what in the world is going on right now, but then someone dims the lights and the music starts. A slow song.

Reeve pulls me tight to him. I try to push him away, to create some space between us, but he just holds on tighter. I look up at him, and his pupils are completely dilated and he’s sweating. He says, “I voted for you.”

I think I heard him wrong, because he doesn’t sound like himself. His voice is far away and dreamy.

“Why are you so mean to me, Cho?”

“I’m not,” I say.

He reaches out and touches my hair, and I jerk my head away from his hand. “Your hair is so soft. Like, really, really soft. Shit. I don’t think I’m allowed to say that.”

Reeve spins me around so I’m facing the crowd again, and I spot Alex watching us from down below. His jaw is set, his eyes fixed on us.

Reeve keeps swaying me round and round in a circle, faster and faster. I finally see Mary, standing in the crowd. She’s biting her lip, her arms wrapped around herself.

“My heart’s beating so fast,” Reeve says, breathing hard. The lightness is gone from his voice, replaced by something lower and more labored, even though he’s smiling.

His heart is beating fast, so fast I can almost hear it. Feel it through his suit jacket.

I draw back. Reeve’s eyes are watery and unfocused. He’s scaring me. I don’t think he even knows where he is, much less who he’s with. He’s holding me so tightly, it’s hard to breathe. I feel light-headed. I’m going to faint, for real this time.

“You’re blurry,” Reeve mumbles, touching my face blindly.

“Reeve,” I say. “Stop.”

“Before . . . you asked about me and Ren. Now I want to ask you something. What about you and Lindy? What are you guys?”

“We’re friends,” I tell him and force a swallow. “That’s it.”

I expect him to say something cruel, the way he usually does when it comes to me and Alex. But it’s different this time. This time he lifts my chin, his fingers trembling. And he kisses me. His mouth is open and wet and warm. I try to push him away, but his hand is on the back of my neck pressing me toward him.

All I can think about is Rennie.

She’s going to kill me.

With all my might I push Reeve off me. He staggers backward a few steps, totally off balance, and I’m afraid he might fall over the edge. The DJ lowers the volume of the song, and everyone down on the gym floor goes silent. Reeve shakes his head, as if he’s trying to get a hold of himself. He starts walking toward me again, but his arms and legs don’t seem to be listening to his brain. “Oh, no,” he moans. He turns and gazes into the crowd, like he’s looking for somebody, and inches his way to the edge of the stage. “Sorry,” he says, shielding his eyes from the spotlight. “I’m sorry, Alex.”

Suddenly Reeve’s whole body tenses up. The color drains from his face. He whispers something.

“Big Easy.”

CHAPTER THIRTY-SEVEN

MARY

BIG EASY. BIG EASY. BIG EASY. IT DOESN’T MATTER how pretty I look tonight. You can put lipstick on a pig, but it’ll still be a pig. I’m Big Easy.

I’ll be her forever.

I’m still in my homecoming dress, I can see it on me, but it feels different. Like soaking wet jeans and a dirty, gravel-covered T-shirt. I rub my hands together, rub my arms. They look normal, my arms, but the skin feels tight and stretched, as if, inside, I’m ballooning to the weight I was when I was twelve.

Suddenly everything electrical in the gymnasium rushes toward me, as if a match were set against hundreds of little rivers of gasoline. If you touched me, I would burn you alive. The hum of sizzling currents drowns out the whispers. The lights overhead, the extensions cords running to the DJ booth, the heartbeats of the people standing around me; it all comes at me. I am magnetic. With trembling hands I push my hair out of my face. Each strand is a live wire.

He’s staring at me, stunned, disbelieving. Disgusted. I shut my eyes, but it’s too bright. There’s nothing but burning white inside me. It has nowhere to go but out.

When I open my eyes, there is the most terrible spark.

CHAPTER THIRTY-EIGHT

LILLIA

EVERY SINGLE LIGHT IN THE WHOLE GYM POPS AT THE same time, and everything goes dark for a second. Then tiny bits of glass start to fall from the ceiling; yellow sparks fly like indoor fireworks. The DJ speakers screech out squeals of feedback interference. Everyone’s screaming and running for cover. The entire place is short-circuiting.

“Lillia!”

It’s Alex, pushing his way through the crowd to the edge of the stage. He’s trying to get to me.

I’m almost to the stairs when I remember Reeve. He’s standing at the edge of the stage, looking out. His whole body is shaking.

I run back to him.

“Come on! We have to get out of here!” I grab the lapels of his suit jacket in my fists and try to pull him away from the edge. But even though I’m right in front of his face, he doesn’t see me. He’s somewhere else. I can tell, because his eyes are dead. Unfocused. He jerks free of my grip.

And then I realize. He’s having a seizure.

He shakes harder and harder, so violently I can’t hold on to him. “Stop!” I scream, falling to my knees.

Reeve plunges off the stage and onto the floor in a twisted heap. His body is in a pile on the ground, his leg bent gruesomely beneath him. He’s not moving at all. Not even blinking.

Someone screams, louder than any other voice, any other sound. So loud, it’s the only thing I hear.

CHAPTER THIRTY-NINE

KAT

AT FIRST I CAN’T EVEN TELL WHAT IT IS. THE NOISE. IT’S so loud and shrill, I have to cover my ears. Even then I can still hear it. So loud it’s like it’s permanently trapped in my ears.

Then I realize. It’s Mary. Our quiet, shy Mary is screaming so hard that it hurts to hear it. I spin in a circle, trying to find her. But it’s too dark. And there are so many people.

It’s pandemonium. Other girls are shrieking, and guys are yelling, and teachers are begging us to stay calm and head for the nearest exit. I’m breathing hard, trying to push my way through the crowd, throwing elbows to get to the door, bits of glass crunching under my boots. The whole gym smells like burning, and sparks are raining down from the broken lightbulbs.