“Come in then; we’ll have lunch here,” I told her and put my belongings on the cute hall table I had sanded back and whitewashed.

“It’s looking so pretty,” she told me, gazing around my kitchen and living room. I followed her eyes when they landed on my cute outdoor sitting area.

“It wouldn’t be without the help Brax and Austin gave me.” I took the big jug of lemonade from the refrigerator, snagged two glasses and wandered outside, setting them down on the sweet two-seater table I had set up under the gazebo.

“He’s losing it,” she told me quietly when we sat down. My head snapped up from pouring the lemonade and I stared at her, unsure if I wanted her to go on or not. “I don’t know what to do about it. He’s destroying himself trying to forget how much he loves you.”

“I— I’m. I can’t fix it. I tried. He won’t listen to me.” I knew how bad it’d gotten. I was watching it too, but what was I supposed to do? I was nursing my own broken heart and Destry wouldn’t listen to me if I said anything about the way he was behaving.

“Did you love him?” Ellie-May asked sincerely.

“I still do, honey.” I ran my hand down my face and explained, “I do still love him.” Sad, but it was the God-honest truth. I loved him like I shouldn’t, like I’d never loved before or probably ever would.

Weeks had passed since I’d held her in my arms, been lost in the sound of her laughter or been overcome by the familiar perfume that lingered in the air at home. Home was empty now she wasn’t there. Austin liked to inform me daily of what was going on with her. I wish he would get it through his thick skull that it killed me hearing about what she was doing. She had moved into a little rundown house at the end of Edgars Lane. The boys had been spending their spare time helping her fix it up while I slumped over the bar at Rach’s and slowly drank myself into oblivion. That was my life now. Work, drinking, passing out and then doing it all over again.

Was today Thursday or Friday? All I knew was that it was another day I was walking through the double wooden doors of Rach’s bar and heading to the familiar booth that was now my sanctuary. I didn’t even need to order; before I knew it, Rach had slid an opened beer in front of me and slid in opposite me, looking at me with concern flooding her face.

“Back again?”

“Where else would I be, Rach? I am here hanging out with my friend.”

“Or are you here because a certain girl is due for a shift tonight?”

It was only last week that Rach had made me aware that my visiting times at her bar always seemed to coincide with the shifts that Amelia was working at the bar. She would work and I’d drink. She didn’t speak to me and I didn’t speak to her. She had tried about a week ago, and in my drunk stupor, I had made a scene; that was the last of her attempts to talk, but it didn’t stop me from being here.

“What the hell is it with you and my brother thinking you can Doctor Phil on me and get away with it? You are as bad as Austin!” I smirked and threw back my beer; the feeling of the cool liquid sliding down my throat offered the emotional comfort I desired. In a few short hours, I’d be passing out and forgetting this shit storm. As I watched her, I noticed something flash over her face, something I had never witnessed before. Was she blushing? Why had her eyes darted away from mine at the mention of Austin’s name?

“Well, someone has got to tell you what it’s like, and if that’s me or your idiot of a brother, then so be it.” She slid out of the booth and took a step towards the bar.

“Rach, wait. Is there something you’ve got to tell me?” I asked, knowing full well I was prying.

“Yeah, there is.” She hesitated briefly before smiling. “Warn me next time you are going to have a breakdown. You are almost drinking my bar out of beer.”

She took off towards the bar in a cloud of laughter. Rach had been a fixture in my life for more years than I could say. I remember her in school. She was in Austin’s year and I swear I thought the two of them would end up shacked up, but then he ran off with Claire and they suddenly stopped hanging out as much. She was a good girl. She could stand her ground; I had witnessed her stand up to guys twice her size many times, and she had a mean left hook. She was everything you’d expect a bar owner to be, but underneath, I knew she was just a girl with a big dream. My thoughts were shattered by the sound of Amelia’s voice floating through the air as she announced her arrival. My heart twisted at the sound of her sweet voice.

Fuck, I wanted her but I knew I wouldn’t have her.

She stopped in the middle of the bar and swung around to where I was seated. Her eyes found mine, and in that second, the world around us disappeared. Her eyes dropped from mine as she rushed behind the bar and began speaking with Rach.

Rach looked over at me quickly. I looked everywhere but behind the bar. I was here to drink and drink I would. One beer led to two, which led to five and a nice buzz was overwhelming my exhausted body. It was about the time when I found myself staring at Amelia once again that Austin had slid in opposite me and sat there with a king-sized grin spreading over his face.

“And what are you smirking at?”

“You’re fucking her without even touching her. Why don’t you just talk to her? Make up with her?” His face suddenly grew serious, his eyes narrowing into mine. “D, I need my brother back. I can’t fucking do this work by myself. You have never had days off work, but in the last three weeks, you’ve barely done a week’s work. Gramps didn’t leave the farm to you to run it in the ground.”