Once she leaves the bathroom, I slam the door shut and collapse to my knees on the tile floor. God, I wish I had someone a little more understanding to talk to, wish I had a mother to call up and ask for advice. But, all I have is a father who hardly ever was a father to me until I was about twenty.

Lila, even though she means well, is too excited over this. She doesn’t get the undiluted terror I feel just thinking those test could be true. The sheer and utter horror over the fact that I might be a mother soon, and I have absolutely no idea what that entails.

As the realization weighs on me, I lie down on the floor, and for the first time in a long time, I cry my heart out.

Chapter 4

Micha

Ella doesn’t show up at my final performance for the tour, and her phone is sending me straight to voicemail every time I call her. I’m trying not to lose my shit over not being able to get a hold of her. More than likely, she’s locked herself up in the attic to paint and has lost track of time—it’s happened before.

I had such huge plans for us tonight. Dinner after the concert, dancing, sex, going home, sex, talking about what’s going on in my career. Sex. Sex. Sex. But, as I pull up to our house and see that all the lights are off, my worry rockets through the roof.

I quickly park the car in the garage, silence the engine, and then rush into the house. The alarm doesn’t go off, which means it wasn’t set, making my worry escalate.

“Ella!” I call out as I drop the car keys onto the kitchen counter and dash for the stairway. “Ella, baby, are you home?”

When I reach the top of the stairs, I hurry to our bedroom door and push it open. Immediately, my heart settles.

Ella is curled up in a ball on the bed, fast asleep.

I cross the room, sink down on the edge of the mattress beside her, and watch her sleep peacefully, softly breathing in and out.

“God, I’m so glad to be home,” I whisper as I kick my boots off.

As they thud against the floor, Ella’s eyelids flutter open. She glances up at me, bleary eyed and disoriented. “Am I dreaming?” she asks as her gaze skims the room then lands back on me.

I sweep her hair out of her eyes. “No, baby, this isn’t a dream. I’m here.”

“What about earlier today?” she mutters as she sits up in bed and stretches her arms above her head. “Was that a dream?”

My brows furrow. “What happened earlier today?”

Her gaze flicks to the bathroom door, then she blinks back to me. “Nothing. I just got sick.” She yawns then slumps against the headboard. “I feel so tired.”

“I’m sorry you’re sick.” I slip off my other boot then climb over her and lay down in the bed. “It feels so good to be in my own bed again.” I bury my head into the pillow and stretch out my arms.

She nods then suddenly her eyes widen. “Oh, my word, I missed your performance, didn’t I?” Her gaze darts to the midnight sky outside the window and the city lights that look like a thousand fireflies dusting the land. “I’m so sorry, Micha.” Shaking her head, she lies down in the bed beside me so we’re lying on the mattress, facing each other. “I can’t believe I missed it. One minute, I was getting ready, and the next, I got sick, and then…” She shudders. “Well, I guess I laid down and fell asleep.”

“It’s okay,” I assure her with an exhausted grin. “There are a thousand ways you can make it up to me.”

She smiles tiredly. “Oh, yeah?”

“Definitely,” I murmur, my gaze dropping to her lips.

I imagine I lean forward to kiss her, but the next thing I know, I’m opening my eyes to warm sunlight filtering through the bedroom.

“Rise and shine, beautiful boy,” Ella singsongs as she leans over me with the world’s most heart-stopping smile on her face.

“What happened? I swear I was talking to you like five seconds ago, and it was nighttime.” I blink up at her then leisurely take in her perky nipples through the fabric of her tank top. Unable to help myself, I reach up and graze one with my thumb.

“We both fell asleep. Guess we’re getting super old.” She shivers, wiggling out of my touch. When I frown, she forces a smile as she reaches for my mouth and fiddles with my lip ring, tracing her fingertip over the metal.

“Or just super overworked.” My fingers find her waist, and my nails delve into her flesh. “We should just relax all day. And I know the perfect way to do that.” I eagerly move up to kiss her lips.

She covers my mouth with her hand, stopping me for the second time in thirty seconds.

What the hell?

“As much as I’d love to get the relaxing day started,” she says as she withdraws her hand, “I have to go to the doctor first.”

I pout. “Well, that’s no fun.”

“Neither is having sex with a sick person.”

“Wouldn’t be the first time.”

She shakes her head as she scoots to the edge of the bed and lowers her feet to the floor. “I know, but my appointment is in like thirty minutes, and it takes fifteen just to get to the doctor’s office.” Her voice quivers toward the end.

My brow crooks as I sit up. “Something’s wrong. I can tell.”

“No, everything’s fine,” she insists as she bolts from the bed and toward the bathroom. “I just need to get my ass cleaned up and on the road. That’s all. Otherwise, I’ll miss my appointment.” With that, she shuts the door, leaving me utterly confused.