But I grabbed her and kissed her again, cutting her off. She moaned into my mouth, and I ripped open her flannel, sending buttons flying, and I pulled away, pausing just a moment when I saw the bindings covering her chest.

What the hell?

I’d have to ask her about that when my head cleared later.

I looked down at the desk, seeing a letter opener, and I grabbed it, slipping the cool brass blade down the inside of the wrap and yanked hard, slicing open the material and seeing her beautiful breasts spring free. I breathed hard, briefly taking in the marks on her skin from being wrapped so tight before I pushed her shirt down her arms and came to her, plastering her chest to mine.

“And what this feels like,” I breathed in her ear, lightheaded at the feeling of her hardened nipples pressed into my chest.

I wrapped my arms around her, going mad with the way her back felt as soft as water and with the way her hair caressed my arms, leaving chills.

She clutched onto me, panting and nervous. “I’m his. I belong to him.”

I nodded, forcing her back toward the bed. “Say it again.”

I dived into her neck, biting the skin there.

“I belong to him.” She moaned, letting her head fall back. “I’ll never be yours. I hate you.”

“But you want me.”

And I pushed her back, sending her falling to the bed.

Holding her eyes, I unfastened my belt, ripped open my fly and pushed the rest of my clothes down my legs and off my body.

She sucked in air faster and faster, her eyes widening and locked on my cock as it stood up rock-hard and ready, just as it had been since she’d started hitting me.

I needed that now. Passion. And it didn’t matter that it was anger. As long as the feelings were strong.

Tears filled her eyes, and I watched her breasts, just big enough to fill my hand, and couldn’t wait to own every damn inch of her.

“Do you want me to stop,” I challenged her, stepping up to the bed and looking down on her. “Here’s your chance. Ask me to stop, and I will.”

She was silent, but then her jaw locked, her eyes grew angry, and she snarled. “Yeah, I knew you were all talk. Go ahead and stop then, pussy.”

I broke into a smile.

Reaching down, I gripped the top of her jeans and panties and yanked them down her legs, the over-sized clothes sliding off without any trouble. She cried out, squeezing her eyes shut, but I knew it was just her pride talking.

Banks had been around rougher guys than me, but I’d make damn sure she didn’t forget this. The little Torrance slut was all mine for however long she kept her legs spread.

I came down on her, groaning at every inch of her skin hot against mine.

I lifted up her knee, and nibbled her lips as I settled myself between her legs. God, I could feel the wet warmth at her center. My body started to shake.

I covered her mouth, feeling her whimpers and moans vibrate under my lips.

Working my hand down between us, I positioned myself and started to push.

She gasped, her muscles suddenly tensing. “I’m scared.”

“Don’t be. Damon doesn’t have to know you loved getting fucked by me more than him.”

And I growled, thrusting hard and deep and sinking into her tight body, my brain barely registering a thin barrier giving way.

She cried out, tossing her head back with her face twisted up in pain. “Ah! Oh, God!”

What the fuck? I stilled.

Her body shook, her nails dug into my shoulders, and she was breathing a mile a minute. It was pain, not pleasure.

I stopped breathing.

No, no, no…What? No.

I lie there, staring down at her as my cock throbbed inside her.

A virgin?

I could feel the confusion etched on my face.

She was a fucking virgin?

She gasped again and again, trying to catch her breath. It slowly calmed as the shock ebbed away, and we both just laid there, her expression starting to relax.

She opened her eyes, looking up into my pained face.

Oh, God. What did I do?

Her lips slowly curved into a half-smile. “Yeah, you didn’t see that coming, did you?”

Banks

Present

“What the hell’s going on?” He looked down at me in agony, all the meanness and cockiness from earlier now gone.

I knew what he was confused about, but I didn’t answer. I blinked through the tears in my eyes.

It had hurt. Just like Damon said it would.

I wanted to pull away from him, but then he’d know I couldn’t take what was happening. I couldn’t help but squirm under him, though, and try to shift the pain.

It burned, and I was uncomfortable. My throat swelled with the tears I was trying to hold in.

Of course, I knew it would only hurt that once, but once was all I would ever suffer, so help me. I clenched my jaw to keep my chin from trembling. I didn’t want to give away the shame I felt. I would never fucking do this again. It didn’t feel good.

“Get off me.” I grunted. I was cold, I ached, and he felt like an intrusion. Like something that shouldn’t be inside me.

“It’s okay,” he whispered under his breath, gently pushing my hair out of my eye. “It’s okay.”

“You got what you wanted, so get off me now.”

I was breaking, and the tears broke free, running down my temples, into my hair. I was ruined. Damon was going to hate me now.

But Kai just shook his head slowly, still looking down at me befuddled. “I didn’t know. I…I thought…” His fingers fell down the side of my face and then down my arm. “What the fuck is happening?”

His forehead dropped to mine, and I was about to shove him off, but I hesitated. Why the hell did he care? Wasn’t this what he wanted? Whether it was my first time or my hundredth, he’d used me like the toy I was to him. What did it matter?

“Who are you to him?” he asked, lifting his head up to look down at me.

“It doesn’t matter. I’ll still choose him. He never hurt me like this. Not like you did.”

He winced, and I could tell I’d cut him. Kai worried he was bad, and he tried to be sinister, but not so deep down, he was good, and it was who he was. He would never change.

He didn’t like hurting me.

He shifted his body, pulling out of me, and I flinched at the renewed soreness between my legs as I tried to close them.

But he didn’t move off me. He stayed nestled between my thighs.

“Look at me,” he told me.

Slowly, I raised my eyes again, and he touched my face.

“I would’ve been gentler your first time,” he said.

“I don’t care.” I shook my head. “I don’t care about any of it.”

Shoving my palms into his chest, I pushed him off me and shot off the bed, bolting.

But he caught me from behind. Wrapping an arm around my waist, he hauled me back, and I gasped, both of us falling back on the bed. I laid on top of him, my back molded to his chest.

My scream was cut off by his mouth as he threaded his fingers through the back of my hair and twisted my head, holding my mouth to his.

I thrashed and jerked, elbowing him as I tried to twist away, but he didn’t let me go. His mouth, strong and demanding, moved to my jaw, my cheek, and my ear, sucking and biting, and I growled, throwing my left hand over my body and slapping him.

“Hurt me. Do what you want with me,” he gasped in my ear. “I deserve it.”

He brought his legs up between mine, bending them at the knee and spreading my own.

His hand slipped between my legs, and I cried out, suddenly afraid, but he stopped and just rested there, unmoving as he held me in his palm.

“Kai!” I yelled, fighting him.

His lips stopped on my cheek, breathing hard and hot. “Not tonight.”

What?

“I’m not Kai,” he said, “and you’re not Banks.”

There was something pleading in his voice that gave me pause.

“Thunder Bay doesn’t exist, and we’re not in The Pope,” he continued. “It’s six years ago when I was happy and excited, and you were curious about everything, and my words were all it took to touch you.”

My entire body stilled, and tears suddenly blurred my vision as he whispered to me.