And I did, sort of. I jostle Jax a little to disguise my unease. “Have some tofu, Jackers. It’s good for you.”

Darby makes another sound. I jerk my head up to see a rueful smile tilt the corners of her lips up.

“Jackers is what I call him, too.”

“Jax is a good name.” We’d talked about the name Jack but Jax is better, I think. More unusual. Every kid is named Jack. I wipe my son’s hands clean and then his face. “You have a good name, little man.” I hold him up and bounce him lightly. He belches and then laughs at his accomplishment. I laugh, too, because how can you not?

He pats my cheek and says, “Kiss.”

I lean forward but he averts his face and points to his mother. “Kiss,” he repeats.

Darby grows flustered and tries to reach for the boy. I hold him to the side. “You heard your son. He wants us to get married.”

She blows a raspberry in my face. “He said kiss, not marriage.”

“Kissing is for married people,” I declare piously. “Jax and I believe that physical contact between two people should be saved for marriage. Good thing that is happening today.”

“We aren’t getting married.”

I shake my head at Jax in mock dismay. “Your mom wants to turn me into a scarlet man. That’s from a dumb book I hope you never have to read, but basically a character gets a letter branded onto their forehead for being loose. You wouldn’t want that for your old man, would you?”

Jax solemnly moves his head back and forth. “Loose,” he repeats and traces his finger over my forehead. Then he points to his mom again. “Kiss.”

“I want to, son. Let me tell you that I want to lay my mouth against your momma’s lips and I’m not talking about the ones on her face.”

“Jonas!” Darby shouts.

“What?” I blink at her with as much innocence as a thirty-three-year-old person can muster which is not much because I have done some filthy things with her. Things that make me hot and hard just at the memory. I shift Jax higher in my arms so he doesn’t accidentally kick my newly formed wood.

“Little pitchers have big ears.” She taps her ears with the tips of her fingers.

“I know, and I can teach him way worse things every minute we’re not married.”

“Are you blackmailing me with my own kid?”

“I could be. I don’t have a lot of shame here. I want you in my life and…” I trail off because Jax is looking at me in great interest and there are some things I think he should wait until he’s like eight or nine before he starts spouting them off to strangers. I know how it goes. Ronnie’s mouth can be a terror at times.

I get to my feet and carry Jax into the bedroom for some reading time. Hopefully it will put him to sleep and then I can show Darby that marrying me sooner rather than later will be best for her mental health because I know damn well she’s not immune to me. Her body tells me all that I need to know. She wants to fuck as badly as I do. I plan to use that against her because, yes, I’ll play dirty over this. It’s too important not to.

Chapter 16

Darby

I sit at the table staring at the doors Jonas left out of with Jax. I’ve heard Jax giggle a few times. I fight getting up and going in there to see what they are doing. I want to give them some time together. They need it. Hell, I need a minute to myself to get my crap together. My mind can’t keep up with everything. A switch has been flipped and gone is the asshole that had his moments of niceness and left is nothing but a man that is too charming for my own good. I could see why I was once in love with him.

My hand goes to my chest when I feel a flutter there. Love. Could I love someone I don’t remember? Is that why I’ve been so drawn to him? So hurt by some of the things he’s said? If he meant nothing to me why had it stung so bad? Why had I so easily left with him? I’d let him hold me while I slept. My mind may not know him but there has to be some part of me that does. I’ve never had this reaction to anyone else. The door opens and I turn my head to pretend I wasn't staring it down.

“He’s asleep. He always crash like that?” Jonas walks toward me. He’s so handsome. But I can tell that the last forty-eight hours have taken their toll on him. I’d only considered what I was going through, not taking into account that this is a lot for him.

“When he gets to cuddling he’s normally out a few minutes later.”

“So he’s like his mama.” I gasp when Jonas lifts me from the chair. I wrap my arms around his neck as he carries me over to a sofa, where he sits down with me in his lap. Something about this seems familiar, as though we’ve done this same exact thing thousands of times before.

“I’m a cuddler?” I know Jax and I cuddle all the time. I let him sleep in bed with me more often than I should. We usually fall asleep together as we watch a movie. I’m excited to see how the three of us will fit together. More than anything, it warms my heart that Jax has someone else in his life to love him besides me. My little angel deserves that and so much more.

“I turned you into one.” His nose rubs along my neck. He sucks in a deep breath, breathing me in. My whole body starts to tingle. My nipples grow hard. Yeah, I’m pretty sure my body knows him. It’s waking up from a very long slumber. “I used to fall asleep wrapped around you. Couldn't help myself.” He kisses my neck. His hand digs into my hips. “You’ve gotten fuller. I like it.” I laugh. From the look in his eyes I know he’s not joking. The desire for me is written all over his face.

“Has a lot about me changed?” I still wonder what makes a man like Jonas fall for someone like me. He said I was alone in the world. I clearly didn't live up to whatever standards his grandmother had in mind. In my defense, I don’t think anyone could live up to her standards.

“No. I wish I could have seen your body change. To see you round with my baby. That I could’ve been there for it all.”

“I’m sorry.” I know it’s not my fault but I’m sorry he missed it, too.

“I’ll get to see the next one.” He pulls me more into him, letting me know I’m not going anywhere. I don’t want to.

“You don’t like me and you don’t believe me,” I remind him, tilting my head to give him more room. “You thought I ran from you. Did I have a reason to run from you, Jonas?” He didn’t answer any of my questions the other night.

“I didn't think you did, but maybe I wasn't as good at protecting you from my family as I should have been.” I can hear regret in his voice. If what he said is true then I wasn't the only one who lost something that day. I’ll never understand why someone would go to such great lengths to keep us apart. It’s almost unimaginable.

“Did you love me, Jonas?” I ask, thinking I already knew that answer to the question. He was not only angry when he saw me but hurt.

“Yes. I will always love you. Even before I pieced together what I think happened I was going to marry you. I didn't care why you ran from me. I just knew I wasn't going to let it happen again.”

His words should scare me but I find that his possessive tone only turns me on more. For so long I’d thought I was all alone. Now here is this man willing to do anything to have me even if I’d done something bad. He doesn't care. He just wants me. I turn in his lap, straddling him. His hand slips under my shirt and up my back.