I said nothing but rose to exit the room. A page was waiting. He knelt at my feet as I tried to keep my composure.

“Your Highness, I have news of your guard. Fearless? They were able to save the leg, but he will be incapacitated for a long while.”

I nodded, not trusting myself to speak.

Grieve thanked him and then stopped him as the boy started to run off. “What time is it?”

“Time? Nearly dawn. The sun breaks in the Court of Rivers and Rushes.”

I looked up at my love. “The longest night is over. But the journey…just begun.”

And since there was little left to say, I told Rhiannon I’d meet her in the common room come noon, and then, slowly, quietly, and with a full guard accompaniment, Grieve, Druise, and I headed back to the realm of Winter to get a few hours of sleep.

Chapter 11

Four hours of sleep later, I opened my eyes, groaning as I realized I had to get up in time to get bathed and dressed and over to meet Rhia by noon. And then I remembered: Wrath and Lainule were gone, and the depression of the night hit me all over again.

As I sat up, I saw that Grieve was already awake and gone. Wondering what the procedure for the day would be now that I was officially in charge, I also saw the silver bell sitting on my nightstand. I rang it and within less than two minutes, Druise entered the room.

She dropped into a deep curtsey as I pushed back the covers and slid out of the bed. “I need to dress for the outer world today. I’m meeting my cousin and we’re going shopping. I need to be able to take my clothes off and on easily, so jeans and a sweater, please.”

Druise nodded. “Yes, Your Highness. What would you like for breakfast?”

“Bacon and eggs. Toast.” I yawned and padded into the bathroom while she popped out to give my order to whomever it was that would be bringing my breakfast. That was another thing I’d have to get used to—I wouldn’t be doing much cooking from now on. Not that I liked to play around in the kitchen much, but raiding the refrigerator at night wasn’t going to be quite as simple now.

I finished in the bathroom—somehow they managed toilets and running cold water, though I had a feeling they didn’t quite work like the ones back home. After washing my hands and then brushing my teeth, I sauntered back into the bedroom. Druise had returned, and she had set up a steaming bowl of water.

“I’m going to need a bath every morning, Druise. We’re going to have to rig up a better way to get hot running water for me, because I’m used to showering twice a day and that’s one thing I don’t want to compromise on.”

She nodded. “I’ll take care of it. We may need a couple of days to set it up, but your wish is our command, Your Highness.” She soaped up a soft cloth and began washing the leftover makeup off my face. “Breakfast will be here in a few moments. His Lordship is with Advisor Strict and bids you to rest today. He said, ‘There will be time enough tomorrow for the running of the realm.’”

I smiled. “His Lordship is a sweetheart. But yes, I do need the day to recuperate. The past few weeks have been hard.” I must have sounded defeated because Druise slipped behind me and began rubbing my shoulders as I dried my face and applied moisturizer.

“I’m sorry, Your Highness.” She sounded so sad that I forced a smile to my face.

“I’ve lived through worse. I’m just…” I stopped. At one point, Wrath had told me, “Don’t show your vulnerability. Not to those who depend on you.” And I knew that I couldn’t talk about my fears to my lady’s maid. Another wall went up, another invisible boundary line. But then, when I thought about it, I’d erected plenty of boundaries when I was on the road with Krystal. I’d hoped, when I returned home, that I could tear down some of my barriers, but apparently my destiny in life wasn’t geared toward allowing many people in my inner circle.

The servant with breakfast appeared and I ate up, suddenly aware of how hungry I was. Meanwhile, Druise got my jeans ready, along with a warm black V-neck sweater and a silver jacket. I dressed quickly, then quickly applied day makeup—dark shadow that made my newly blue eyes pop, and a sheen of barely there gloss.

Standing back, I observed myself in the mirror. Not bad. I was looking far more pulled together than I used to, and my 140 pounds of muscle was taut and strong. As I allowed Druise to affix my circlet on my head, I realized that I’d promised to meet with Lannan tonight. Joy o’ joys.

When I was done, I headed for the door. “Druise, you stay here. I don’t want to subject you to the outer world just yet. It’s going to be a big surprise, if you’ve never been out there.”

She dipped into another curtsey. “Thank you. But you will take the guards?”

I grinned at her. “I doubt if I could get out of here without them. Yes, I’ll take Check and…well, Fearless is out of commission for now, but I’ll take guards with me.” Actually, after the attack the night before, I really didn’t want to go out without an escort.

Check was waiting for me outside the door, with another guard. “Your Highness, may I introduce Teral? He will be filling in for Fearless.”

I nodded at the new man, who looked big and burly enough to take on just about anybody. They fell in behind me.

Those who returned to the Court of Snow and Ice—and there were quite a number of them who had made the move—had been calling me “Your Highness” since Lainule had first made the announcement that Rhia and I were to become the new Queens. But today, as I walked through the halls, each person near me dropped into a curtsey or bow until I had passed by. I stood a little straighter, suddenly more mindful of my appearance.

“Check, can I ask you something?” He’d served with Lainule, and before that, with Tabera, I’d found out, always as one of their personal guards.

“What do you wish to know, Your Highness?”

“Should I…do I say anything when they bow like that?” I wanted to add, I’m clueless, but decided that could be left unsaid.

A little smile crept out. He shook his head. “It’s not necessary. If you greet everyone who bows to you, you’ll never have any time for anything. It’s…it goes hand in hand with being the Queen, Your Highness. You’ll get used to it, and you’ll come to expect it. Her Highness Lainule may have been born to her post, but she was just as uncertain when she took the throne.”

I jerked around to face him. “You were with her when she was young? When she took over the Court of Rivers and Rushes?”

He nodded. “I was born to the year she was. We were…I was thought to become King-Elect, and then she met His Lordship Wrath.”

The long stretch of history of this realm, of the people who made it what it was, flashed before my eyes.

“You were from the Court of Snow and Ice even then?”

“As was my brother, Lord Wrath.”

Brothers. That meant…

“You’re my uncle?” I stared at him, searching for the resemblance, but could find none.

He shook his head, again, the flicker of a smile gracing his face. “Not by blood, no. Wrath and I were oath-brothers, much like His Lordship Grieve, and His Lordship Chatter. We were in training together, and we were assigned to be…what you would call exchange students in your world…at the Court of Rivers and Rushes. There I met Lainule, and she and I fell in love. It wasn’t passionate, but the kind of love that feels like it could be a steady glow. And then I introduced her to His Lordship Wrath. At that moment, when their eyes met, when they looked at one another, in that moment I knew I’d lost her. I stepped aside.”

“And so my father became the King and you…”

“I pledged my honor to them and changed courts. When you have fallen in love with the sun, you can’t just walk away. I swore to protect the both of them—she whom I’d loved, and he whom she loved.”

“Did you hate my father?” I had to know. It might affect how he looked at me.

“Hate him? How could I hate the man who was my brother, even if he did sweep away the woman I loved?” He sounded so sincere that there was no way I could believe otherwise.

“Thank you for telling me. There’s so much about my father I don’t know…I barely knew he was my father before he had to leave.” As we approached the exit to the outside, a thought struck me. “Some of you—Grieve, Chatter, you, Fearless…you have names that, in English, describe…qualities. Others like Lainule and you, Teral, don’t. What’s the difference?”

Teral glanced at me, a quizzical look on his face. “How are children named in your world?”

“By their parents,” I said, confused.

He cocked his head, and I had the feeling that hadn’t been the answer he had expected.

Check laughed. “When women are pregnant, they visit the seers. The seer tells them whether their child will be what are known as Will-Begots. The children have extremely strong abilities and life forces, and their destinies are specifically focused. While the stars do not speak of exactly what these destinies are to be, the children who are Will-Begots always end up having a lasting effect. Will-Begots are named after those attributes that speak strongly in their soul to the seers.”

“So you are Check…”

“Because I keep others in check. Grieve, because his soul sang of grief to the seer when he was young. And so forth. Those who are not Will-Begots are named whatever their parents choose to name them.” He opened the door and escorted me out, with Teral behind us.

The blast of winter startled me, but only for a moment. The sled awaited and I settled myself in, allowing Check to spread a thick fur blanket over me as we headed to the twin hollies. I had a dozen more questions, but I decided a few at a time were enough.

Are you with me, Ulean?

As you need me, always.

Then let’s go.

As we approached the portal, I wondered how the town would look now. And if Rhia and I could be just cousins, out shopping, ever again.

Rhiannon was waiting for me just outside the portal by the Twin Oaks. She was wearing a pretty dress, but it looked a lot like the ones in her closet—a sage green sheath dress, and she’d added a golden belt. Her boots were brown and knee-high, and she wore a brown velvet coat over the top of her dress. A golden circlet with a yellow topaz centered in it mirrored my own silver crown. Two guards stood watch beside her, and Check and Teral joined them.

“Where are Peyton and Luna?”

“They’re waiting up at the house for us. I made sure they took guards with them. Rex has promised to act as our chauffeur for the afternoon.” She stretched, and the crown around her head gleamed.

“It seems odd.” I glanced around at the woodland. “For the past few weeks, their lives have been integrally connected with our own and now…now it feels like we’re splitting off into different directions. I feel kind of isolated.”

“I know what you mean. In a way, I think you’ve got it easier. Tabera has been dead for some time. You don’t have to follow directly in the footsteps of someone who was beloved by her people. I feel like I’m going to be compared every time I turn around. Lainule did it this way…Lainule said that…Lainule would have made a different decision. Chatter says that I’m overthinking the matter, but…”

“But it’s true.” I reached out, took her hand. “You’re right, it is going to be harder for you. But you’ll do fine. I’ll do fine. We have to believe that.”

“We’d better go—they’ll be expecting us soon.” Rhia turned to the guards. “We’re ready.” And so, with two in front of us and two to the rear, we took off, running at top speed until we spotted the edge of the Golden Wood.

As we slowly exited the forest, slowing to a normal pace, the Veil House was lit up and looked warm and cozy from the outside. Luna was standing on the back porch, and she waved to us and said something over her shoulder.

“Are they safe? What if the day-runners come back?”

“Chatter and I ordered a dozen guards to keep watch. They’re hidden around the property. Luna and Peyton should be safe. Kaylin can’t join them yet; it’s going to take him a while to recuperate.” Rhia waved to Luna, then stopped, turning to me. She moved me off to the side, out of the way of the guards. “I miss this. I miss hanging out with the others, even though we were fighting Myst. I even miss the warehouse. I don’t know how to be a Queen, Cicely. I’m scared.”

I took her hands in mine. She had lost the regal look and now just was my cousin, afraid and looking too tired. “I know, I feel the same, but there’s no going back. Our heartstones belong to the realms. We’re due to marry soon. We’ll adjust, somehow. I just wish Lainule and Wrath hadn’t had to go.”

I took a deep breath and leaned over to kiss her cheek. She hugged me and then, after a moment, we turned, hand in hand, and ran up to the porch, where Luna and Peyton were waiting.

By two thirty, we were walking down the streets of New Forest, like four normal young women on a shopping spree. The guards walked discreetly in back of us, with Rex by their side. The shoppers who passed us whispered, and I had the feeling we were known entities.

Ulean swept against me. If you don’t need me right now, I would like to explore the area, see if I can find any sign of Shadow Hunters.

Go. We’re just going to be shopping. Everything will be fine.

The streets were coated with ice, and the cars that went by drove slowly, cautiously as they navigated through the ever-building snow. The sidewalks were dangerous and slippery, and twice Luna almost fell. Rhiannon wasn’t doing so bad—apparently our transformation had helped her on the snow and ice, the same way Grieve and Chatter and the other Cambyra managed it. Peyton wore thick-soled hiking boots, and they gripped the ice with a surety that I’d never felt. But I—I could practically dance across it now, and I did a couple of delighted spins around the others, giggling as I glided over the thick chunky ice.