Now I Rise Page 38

“Radu!” Cyprian said, holding him tightly. “I have been looking everywhere for you. There is a saboteur in the city. They caught him trying to light a fire. I was so worried about you.”

Radu took a deep breath, trying to calm his voice. “I heard the bells and went out to see what was wrong. I feared the Ottomans had finally arrived. But why would you worry about me?”

Cyprian lingered in the hug, then pulled back, his hands still on Radu’s shoulders. “If the sultan’s man had discovered you …” His eyes were wrinkled with concern. “I feared for your safety.”

Radu embraced Cyprian again, both because it was warm and comforting against the weariness of this long night, and because it was the only way he could hide how touched and sad he was that Cyprian’s first fear had been for Radu’s traitorous life.

26

Early April

A CLOUD OF dust hung in front of the window, where musty drapes had been hastily tugged aside. The room was in the back of the house, on the second floor. Lada could see across a fallow field to the hedge where she had watched for her mother. But it was not clear enough to make out where her men waited for her.

She hoped they were still waiting for her. She felt so cut off. What if they left her, too? Radu was lost to her. Mehmed was a traitor. She had separated herself from Hunyadi. She could not lose her men.

The maid cleared her throat. Lada expected the girl to leave, but she just stood there next to the steaming bath she had filled.

“Well?” Lada snapped.

“I will help you undress?”

“No!”

The girl recoiled as if struck. “I am supposed to.”

“You are not supposed to.”

“But— I was to wash your hair, and plait it for you after, and help you into one of her ladyship’s dresses.” The girl frowned worriedly, looking at Lada’s thick waist and large chest.

Lada laughed, the absurdity of it all finally getting to her. Here she was, seeing her mother for the first time in fifteen years, and her mother wanted to brush her hair and dress her up. No—her mother wanted someone else to do it for her. That made sense. At least Oana was not here. She would have been thrilled to volunteer.

“You may stand outside the door so that she thinks you are still in here. And then you may take a message and some food to my men outside. You will see their campfire.”

The girl squeaked in fear. “Men! I could not. It is forbidden. Oh, please, do not ask it of me. If she knew, if she found out—”

Lada held up her hands. “Very well! They will last until I go back to them. Get out.”

The girl nodded, wringing her hands, and slipped out the door. Lada followed, putting her ear to the door. She could hear the rapid, panicked breaths of the girl immediately outside.

What went on in this house?

Lada took a bath. Over the last year on the run, she had learned never to turn down a bath or a meal. But she did not wash her hair, or make any effort to tame it. She dressed again in her traveling clothes—breeches, a tunic, and a coat, all black. A red sash around her waist. When she was done putting her boots on, she opened the door. The maid was so close their noses nearly touched.

“Your hair?”

Lada shook her head, expression grim.

“I found some of her ladyship’s old dresses. I could let out the seams, and …” The girl trailed off, hope dying on her face as Lada’s expression did not change.

“When is supper?” Lada asked.

“She has already eaten.”

“Without me?”

“Our schedule is very specific.” The maid leaned forward, looking to either side as though fearful of discovery. “I will bring you some food from the kitchens later tonight,” she whispered.

Lada did not know how to respond. With gratitude? Incredulity? Instead, she pushed forward with her goal. “If supper is over, I can see her now.”

“Yes! She will be waiting to receive visitors in the drawing room.”

“Does she receive many visitors?”

The maid shook her head. “Almost never.”

“So she is only waiting to see me.”

“After supper, she waits to receive visitors. You are a visitor. So you may see her now.”

Lada followed the girl through the hall and down the stairs. She would much rather be facing a contingent of Bulgars, or a mounted cavalry. At least those she would understand.

Mehmed’s mother, Huma, suddenly came to mind. Huma had been ferocious and terrifying. She had wielded her very womanhood like a weapon, one Lada did not understand and could not ever use. Was that what her mother was doing? Throwing Lada off guard to gain the upper hand? Huma had been able to manipulate Lada and Radu by forcing them to meet on her terms. Her mother must be doing the same thing.

It was comforting, in a way, girding herself to meet a challenge like Mehmed’s formidable mother. Huma was a foe worth having. A murderer many times over, who had even had Mehmed’s infant half brother drowned in a bath. Lada shuddered, the back of her hair wet against her neck. Was there a darker reason the maid had tried to insist on staying during Lada’s bath?

She regarded the tiny, trembling thing ahead of her with new suspicion. Flexing her hands, Lada dismissed the notion. Though Lada was certain that if her mother wanted her dead, she would make someone else do it. This waif would have to resort to poison or murdering her in her sleep. She was glad she had missed supper, after all.

But everything Huma had done, she had done to further her son’s place in life. What would Vasilissa stand to gain by killing Lada? And why did Lada find it more comfortable to think of Vasilissa as a potential assassin lying in wait than as her mother?

Before Lada could settle her mind, the maid opened a door to a sitting room. It was like being greeted by an open oven. The air was too close and heated past any reasonable degree. The windows were shuttered tightly, and a fire roared in a fireplace too large for a room this size.

The maid practically tugged Lada inside, closing the door as quickly as possible behind them. It took a moment for Lada’s eyes to adjust to the dim room. Her mother sat in a high-backed chair, hands folded primly in her lap, voluminous skirt hiding her feet. Her hat had been replaced with a long veil pinned at the top of her head that completely obscured her face. She was not wearing the same dress as before. This one was white, with a ruffled neck so high it looked as though her veiled head sat on a platter. All the dress’s folds and pleats nearly swallowed her whole.

“Oh,” she said, an entire discourse in disappointment contained in that single word. “You did not change.”

Lada longed to draw her knives, sheathed at her wrists. “These are my clothes.” She took the chair opposite her mother without being invited. It sank under her weight, the stuffing worn and the velvet threadbare.

“Would you like something? Tea? Wine?”

“Wine.”

Vasilissa nodded toward the maid, who poured two glasses and handed one to each of them. Lada took a sip. Or rather, she pretended to take a sip, preferring to wait until her mother drank first. Huma was too recently on her mind to risk otherwise. So far her mother was nothing like Huma, though. Huma had filled the space around her, no matter how large the room. Even in this small room, Lada’s mother seemed to blend into the furniture.

Vasilissa lifted her veil and took a dainty sip. Lada followed suit. Her mother’s eyes were large, like hers, but there was more of Radu in her face. It was startling, seeing her brother reflected in the face of a stranger. Lada could not place the exact similarities; they had something delicate and beautiful in common. But her mother’s face was worn and broken at the edges. Was that what would happen to Radu, too? Would he fade with time, become a withered shadow of himself?

Lada longed for Radu at her side yet again. If he were here, she could focus on protecting him. Having only herself to protect made her feel so much more vulnerable.

“Tell me,” her mother said, keeping a hand in front of her mouth. “What brings you to the countryside? It is not so lovely this time of year, I am afraid. Much nicer once spring has taken hold.”

Lada frowned. “I am here to see you.”

“That is sweet. We do not have many visitors.” She lowered her hand, smiling with tightly shut lips. Then she simply stared. Lada wondered if her own large, hooded eyes were that disconcerting.

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