Real Vampires Don't Diet Page 4


"Glory's upset. Ignore her." Ray put his hand over his heart. "I swear it, Aggie. I don't know what the situation is with Sirens, but I don't make promises I can't keep."


"Sirens have their own code. Which I'm accused of, ahem, bending. Strictly speaking, Achelous, the Storm God, is my boss, not Circe, but she found out about my transgressions and is blackmailing me."


Cue the thunder and boat tossing. At least this time I could hold on to something, though Ray's railing was getting bent all to hell and back.


"Well, sorry, sister Circe, but that's what it is. Calm yourself. I'm playing by your rules. I know you're listening. The guy's offering to serve up some vampire men." Aggie looked at me. "Are they hot? Circe really likes to roast and toast hot guys." I thought about the one I really hated. Ugly as sin, but he could make himself look like anyone's dream guy, one of his more useful talents. Some of his evil minions were actually good-looking.


"Yes. We can come up with three hot vampires for Circe." I breathed a sigh of relief when the boat quit rocking and the wind calmed.


"There you go, then. Let me finish negotiations, your goddessness." Aggie sighed. "Touchy, touchy. But powerful. You don't want to get crossways with any of the hierarchy. Trust me on that."


"So do we have a deal?" Ray's smile was looking a little strained.


"Not necessarily. What if I want more than just a video with you?" Aggie scooted closer to him, until her scales were making his jeans wet. Ugh.


Ray shook his head. "We'd have to play it by ear. See how things go."


Aggie nodded at me. "What about her?"


Her, me, I just stood there, visions of Ray hooking up with this swamp thing making my skin crawl, no matter what form she ended up in. I knew what he was doing, trying to talk our way out of this. And clearly Aggie had no interest in hearing from me so I kept my trap shut.


"Glory and I are just friends. She's teaching me about being a vampire. Like a mentor. I've only been this way for a few weeks. The tabloids made us a couple, but it's all an act. We sneaked out on the boat so Glory could teach me more about being a vamp, that's all."


Gee. Would it have killed him to pretend we were lovers? Not that I should care. Ray was only telling the truth. I had Jerry, a boyfriend who said he loved me even if he did stand me up on the most important date night of the year. Yeah, and look where that had landed me. Hostage to the swamp thing here. Jerry was so going to pay for this. The thought of retribution almost made me smile.


Aggie smirked. "Wait'll you see me in my regular form. I'm much more your type than this oversize vampire." She flung out a hand, seaweed trailing from her fingertips.


"I'm sure you're beautiful, but then so is Glory." Ray turned to smile at me. "I'd appreciate it if you didn't disrespect her. I owe her my life."


Wow. Now how was that for a feel-good moment? I smiled back and waited for Aggie to throw a thunderbolt at me or something.


"Huh. Whatever. Maybe I'll think about your 'deal' while you sing." Aggie laid that icky hand on Ray's thigh. I gritted my teeth but kept quiet. Ray began to sing. It was a new song. About finding out who you are when you've lost your way. Good choice. I'd like to get lost right now. Ray was getting to Aggie, I could tell. Her eyes closed and she swayed with the music. By the time he came to the end, she was humming the chorus, but Circe had clearly taken her voice because even that was painful to listen to.


"Oh, Ray. Did you write that song?" You knew I couldn't stay quiet forever.


"Yep. Just yesterday. Seems the vamp gig hasn't dried up my creative juices. For a while I was afraid they'd gone along with my ability to chow down on a steak and fries." Ray's grin was full of relief.


So he really had been worried. I wanted to reach out to him but Aggie stopped me with a hard look.


"Nope. You've still got it, handsome." Aggie grabbed Ray's hand and pulled it to what passed for a scaly bosom. "Great song. You and me, Ray. I'm thinkin' we could have made beautiful music together if I didn't have to give you to Circe."


"Guess we'll never know." Ray shrugged. "What'll Circe do to us if you give Glory and me to her?" Aggie winced. "She hates the night. So vampires are a boil on her backside. She'll torture you until she decides to put you in the sun to die. Or maybe she'll stake you. No, probably not. Too quick." She gave me a narrow-eyed look. "She really really hates men. I don't think Glory there would do it for her. Oh, she'd take you out, hon. But I'd probably be sent back to get another vamp anyway. A hot guy or at least a good-looking one."


"Well, then. I should just get the hell out of here." I felt queasy and my knees were weak, talk of stakes and death by sunlight did that to me. "But I'm taking Ray with me. Come on, Aggie. You know you can't send Israel Caine to a certain and ugly death. Did you hear him just now? Could you really silence that voice? Destroy that talent?" I got up, ready to wrench Ray out of her slimy grasp. I'd taken one step when I was frozen again.


"Aggie, let her go. You just said Glory is a nonstarter. Let her swim to shore. I'll sing another song." Ray scooted closer and put his arm around Aggie. "One last song before I die."


"Aw, you've got me. Glory's right, Israel. I can't let Circe destroy you. You sing like an angel. I really respect a voice like that." Aggie slumped. "But I've got to get out of this nasty body. If I agree to this deal, you've got to come across with those three male vamps. And soon."


"I will. You've got my word on it."


"More than that. I've got you both on a leash." Aggie grinned. Oh, those teeth.


"What do you mean a leash?" Ray said what I was thinking. Oh, God, I hated not being able to move so much as an eyelash. I couldn't even swallow spit.


"Now that I've got your scent, I can call you to me at any time. Both of you. No matter where you are, you won't be able to run away, far enough or fast enough. I can make you come to me. Like a compulsion. Just hope there's a boat nearby or you'll be swimming for your life. Never doubt it. That's the power of a Siren. Even one who's cursed." She waved a ringer and I was limp again.


I took a moment to swallow, blink and generally celebrate being able to move. Then I stood up and faced her.


"Gee, you're just full of power, then, aren't you? But if we bring you three other male vampires, you'll leave us alone? That'll be the end of our 'relationship'?" I was really sick of this "now you're frozen, now you're not" crap. And really eager to never see this creature again.


"Right. Bring them to the lake. And fast." Aggie looked up at the sky. "By the next full moon. That's three weeks away. That's my deadline. So it's yours too. If I have to, I'll take you two. I figure Israel Caine is a big enough catch to satisfy Big Mama." There was a clap of thunder. "Well, if I can't find three men anyway." Aggie scratched at some red patches on her scales. "I've got about five minutes before I have to get back in the water. Sing me my favorite song, Ray. 'My One True Love.'" Aggie grinned. "And sing it to me. Then I want a big juicy kiss to seal our deal." She turned to me, her crooked eyes narrowing. "Start swimming, vampire. We want to be alone."


Then she tossed me overboard.


Chapter Three


The water was damned cold. I'd been swimming for hours. I sure wished I could touch bottom. Something brushed my arm and I shrieked.


"Glory?"


I heard the chug of a boat engine and saw the sweep of a search light.


"Over here." I waved an arm. Stupid move. I sank like a stone. I came up sputtering just as a life ring hit a few feet away.


"Grab the ring, and I'll haul you aboard." Ray sounded hoarse.


I threw my arm over it and hung on, too tired to do more than grunt as he reached for me and dragged me into the cockpit. I was shivering in earnest now, wet from my ruined suede Marc Jacobs boots to my dripping cashmere sweater that would probably shrink once it dried. Damn. The icy wind kicked up. Double damn.


"Get out of those wet clothes. Here's a blanket you can wrap around you. I'll get us back to the house." Ray went to the wheel, pushed the throttle and the boat rocketed forward.


I decided against an undignified struggle to peel off tight jeans while a boat tossed me like a silver ball in a roulette wheel (old gambling problemdon't ask). I staggered to the bench seat that looked surprisingly slime free and sank down, pulling the blanket over my shoulders.


A few minutes later the night sky lit up and sounds like gunshots made me drop to the deck and cover my head. Ray shut off the engine and we coasted across the water.


"What?" I figured I looked little better than Aggie as I swiped strings of wet hair out of my eyes. Hey, bullets couldn't kill me, but I'd had a rough night, okay?


"Relax, Glory. Fireworks. It's midnight." Ray helped me up to the seat again. He used the corner of the blanket to wipe my cheeks. "You all right?"


"Not really. God, I think there's something crawling in my bra." I stretched out my sweater and tried to see.


"Want me to check?" Ray grinned when I pulled a string of some kind of plant from my cleavage and tossed it overboard.


"Just get me back to dry land. What's the holdup?"


Ray glanced at the sky, then at the Rolex on his wrist. "In a minute. Like I said, it's midnight. Happy New Year."


"Tell me you're not expecting a kiss." I stared at his lips, which were firm, sexy and, I knew firsthand, extremely talented. "Did you have to kiss Aggie?"


Ray grinned. "I never kiss and tell. Come on, it's tradition." He leaned toward me, eyes closing. I put my hand in the middle of his chest. I'm strong, vamp strong. I could hold him off all night if I really wanted to. "Ray, I'm not kidding here. Swamp thing kissed you? Then it's going to take some serious dental hygiene before" He was obviously pretty strong himself because his mouth was suddenly on mine and his lips didn't taste a bit nasty. His tongue was clever and not slimy at all.

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