Touching the side of his face, I nod. “I understand.” My words carry more meaning, and I wonder if he knows how much I understand. He lost everything before and failed to stop it. The death of Amanda fractured his life in a way that he was unable to repair. If Sean doesn’t stop this lunatic from messing with me, it’ll destroy him. The final pieces that hold him together will come unhinged and the monster lurking within him will be the cause of his demise.

Sean’s body shakes with tension that borders on rage. I know what he needs and I want to give it to him. I press my lips together and say the words he has to hear. “Take me, any way you want. Use me, Sean.”

Breathing hard, he looks down, watching me. The fear slips off his face and the part of him that frightens me emerges. There’s no rational thought, no logic in those eyes. It fades to something carnal and out of control. Sean grabs my dress at the neckline and tears it in two. The sudden movement, the sound of the fabric tearing, startles me. Before I can blink, he’s on top of me, ripping off my clothes and tossing them aside until I’m naked. My heart is pounding so hard that I’m sure that he can hear it. I don’t have the nerve to look him in the eyes anymore, even though I want to. I focus on his chest, on the places I want to touch, but I don’t dare. Not now, not when he’s like this.

Sean straddles me, pinning me to the bed and rips off his belt. Quickly, he flips me over so I’m facedown and yanks my hands above my head. Within seconds my wrists are bound together and tied to the headboard. He leaves my feet untethered and I wonder if it’s because he wants to or because he’s changing. Sean is different now, isn’t he? This isn’t like the first time he did this to me. Besides, I volunteered. I knew what I was giving permission for this time. Maybe I’m the one who’s changed.

I feel his breath in my ear before I hear his voice. “Stop thinking.” I try to shove all the thoughts from my mind, but I kind of suck at it. Sean’s hand comes down hard on my bare ass. The sting makes me yelp. “Say, ‘yes, sir.’”

My lips curl into a defiant, smug, expression. “Yes, Sean.”

His hand comes down again, stinging the other cheek. I gasp, and try to look back at him, but I can’t see him very well. He’s directly behind me and I can only make out his location. “Wrong words will get you punished, Miss Smith. I want you to say, ‘yes, sir.’”

An insane urge to defy him rouses inside of me as a smile creeps across my face. I mean, what’s he going to do? Hit me again? I kind of like that a little bit. It makes my girlie parts tingle. I’d be good with another slap. So I chide, “Yes, Mr. Jones.”

Sean lets out a little noise, like he can’t believe I defied him again, but his shock is short lived. He takes a pillow and shoves it under my hips, before parting my legs. I have no idea what he’s going to do, but I like it. Thrill rushes through my veins, making me tug at my restraints. I want to tease him and do everything I shouldn’t. Maybe I’m as messed up as he is.

He holds my legs open wide and with that deep voice of his, gives me another chance. “Stop thinking.”

I’m insane. “No.” The word rings out like someone slapped a gong.

My ass is in the air, thanks to the pillow. I expect his hand to come down on my round cheeks again, but it doesn’t. Instead his open palm slaps me between my thighs, stinging my most sensitive parts. The jolt startles me and I try to crawl away, but Sean holds my hips still. “Say it.”

I bite my lips and feel his hand come down again. This time it brings tears to my eyes, but there’s something else, too. I don’t know how to describe it. My insides feel like they’re on fire and I want to be sated. Am I as messed up as he is? He’s spanking my pussy and I like it. What the hell does that mean? Before another thought can cross my mind, his hand lands between my legs again and I yelp.

Without warning, Sean slips a finger up into me and I gasp. He’s quiet for a moment and then removes his hand and leans over my back, pressing his body to me. His face appears next to mine, lightly pushing my cheek into the pillows. “So, it appears that you have a rather deviant desire, since getting spanked makes you so wet.”

“It does not. I—” before I can finish my lie, Sean shoves the finger that was inside me into my mouth.

“Suck.” My tongue tastes the sweetness and recognizes my scent. I do as he says, and suck his finger until it’s gone and I only taste Sean’s skin. “Good girl. And remember, behavior that pleases me will be rewarded.”

I like the sound of that. “Anything I want?”

“Yes, if you behave yourself. Up until now, I have to say, you’ve been rather naughty. I’d slap you again, but I think you actually like it, so onto other things.”

I nearly whine, okay, beg, for him to do more, but think better of it. Crazy Sean sounds more composed than I thought he’d be, which is interesting. “Back to you being good—say, ‘yes, sir.’”

I make a face into the pillow and mutter. “Yes, sir.” Being bad is more fun, at least I think it is until I feel Sean’s naked body pressed to my back and he’s kissing me. Damn, he stripped fast. His hard length pushes against my butt cheeks as his lips find the spot on my shoulder that makes me melt. He’s close to finding my slut button—the spot that makes me totally wanton—so I wiggle, trying to get him away from it, because I want to keep my mind and defy him just a little bit longer, and as soon as he finds that spot, I’m toast. I’ll be begging him for anything and everything. Damn him. I think he mapped my body when I wasn’t paying attention.

Sean holds me in place, inching his lips closer and closer to the spot on my back, while one of his hands dips between my thighs. He forces them open and lifts his head for a moment. “Do whatever feels good, baby. I won’t force you. Not this time.”

What? My mind snaps to full alert right as Sean dips his head and lands his sinful mouth on the perfect spot on my shoulder. I gasp and wiggle, trying to get him to stop for half a second before I go still. His lips are pressed to my skin, while his tongue strokes against me. My body writhes without my consent as the place between my legs goes from damp to wet. My mind fades and I feel—no, I want. Sean’s fingers press between my thighs and up inside of me, making me moan. My hips buck, not satisfied with fingers as he kisses my back. I want him, and I start saying things that would normally make me blush.

Sean pulls his fingers out and lifts them to my mouth. “Lick them.” I do as he says, closing my eyes, and enjoying the way my body responds to his voice, to his commands. His lips work the spot on my back and I suck on his fingers, imagining that it’s his hard length dripping with come.

He lifts his head. “Good girl.” When he pulls his fingers away, I pout, but the emotion is short lived.

Sean takes hold of my hips and pushes into my slick core, slow and hard. I moan and beg for things I should never say. He sounds happy, teasing me, pushing in slowly and then pulling out to his tip, before slamming into me again, deeper. I beg for him to pound into me, spank me, and anything else.

Sean sounds content, almost happy, when he whispers in my ear. “Tell me when to stop.”

Before I can beg him to fuck me more, he’s gone. His body leaves mine and his lips are suddenly between my legs. His hot breath makes my thighs tense, but Sean pushes them apart and licks my slick flesh with his tongue. Stroke after stroke, he stays there, pressing his fingers into me, licking and sucking. I have no idea what he’s doing, but I’m screaming out his name begging him to take me. I need him, my entire body is strung tight, craving the release. Sean brings me to the edge and I think he’s going to tip me over into ecstasy, but he pulls away two seconds too soon. I scream and thrash when he disappears. His warmth is gone and I’m begging him to come back.

“Sean, please…” my voice is so breathy, and so completely shameless. I’d beg him for anything, to make me come any way possible. I need him deep inside me. I beg him again, and he’s back, lying next to me.

“Tell me what you want, baby.”

“Make me come, please Sean. I want you inside me. Please.”

Before anything else is said, I feel something cold slip between my legs. Sean pushes a toy deep inside and it starts to vibrate. I feel so let down that it’s not him that I nearly cry. I want Sean. That’s when things go a different direction. He lowers his head to between my thighs and returns to the spot he’d been licking and pressing his fingers to before. I tense when I realize where he is and what he’s doing. His tongue licks behind the vibrator at the delicate skin, and then over—oh God. I shouldn’t like that, but it’s making me feel positively high. My hips slow as apprehension chokes me.

Sean notices and returns to the spot on my back, but keeps the vibrator between my legs. He kisses my slut button and my mind turns off. Just like that, all my thoughts vanish and I’m all animal again. My hips buck, trying to find release, but Sean doesn’t move the toy or increase the speed. I whimper and beg for things that I didn’t know I wanted.

Sean is on top of me, and I feel his hard length pressing against my back while he holds the toy in place. He whispers into my ear, “I know you want it. Tell me baby, and I’ll do it. Tell me to fuck you like this.”

I can’t. Even though I’m writhing against him, I can’t say it. His lips dip to the spot on my back and after a while he tries again, but I still won’t admit it, so he does the unthinkable and backs away.

“No!” I thrash, trying to see him. The toy is gone, Sean’s warm body is gone, and I need him. Every part of me is pulsing with need. I can’t control myself and I know I want what he’s offering.

“Then say it.”

“I want you to fuck my...”

“Say it,” he growls, his voice deeper than I’ve ever heard it.

“Fuck my ass.” The words come flying out of my mouth and sound horribly dirty to me. I beg him over and over again, and I tell him that I want him inside of me in every way possible, now. Then I plead with him to come back and sate me. “Sean, please.”