Hope you’re okay.

-Ruby

P.S. Yes it is my mom. Deal with it.

From: [email protected]

Date: November 30, 2008 1:22 p.m.

To: [email protected]

Subject: Not Dealing With It

Ruby,

I would never want to be an officer. I already deal with enough political BS. Being commissioned increases the BS to levels I’m not willing to handle. Plus, half the officers I’ve met have been entitled pricks. Not all of them, but enough.

Your “mom” and your “sister” look like twins. What does your grandma look like? Do you look like them? I don’t mean that in a sketchy way. I won’t be sending you any “tick lick” pictures all of a sudden. Don’t worry.

Heh. Yeah, we did get into all kinds of… things when we were younger. The problem was not getting caught. We used to make napalm, mess with electrical stuff… Good times. Don’t know how I didn’t lose a finger at least thinking back on it now.

Your costumes are amazing. I don’t understand how you think you aren’t creative enough. I don’t know anyone that could do what you’ve made. Do you go all out with your makeup when you cosplay? My favorite was your Ghost Rider outfit.

You’re really talented. I’m not just saying it. Remember that.

I’m not the jealous type. I don’t know… maybe I didn’t pay enough attention to her. It wouldn’t be the first time an ex has told me that. I wouldn’t sit somewhere and expect her to go behind my back while we were together, but now? I wouldn’t be surprised. I should’ve expected it. She broke up with me out of the blue. I e-mailed her to ask if there was someone else right after… I was angry. She said that wasn’t it, that there wasn’t anybody else. I can’t talk myself into asking any of our mutual friends what she’s up to and if she’s with someone else. Should I?

Hold up… you were into someone for so long that you never wanted to date anyone else? Why wouldn’t they want to be with you? You seem like a great girl. Why would you wait for somebody anyway? How long did you like him? This all sort of blows my mind. I’ve never known anyone over the age of 18 who hasn’t been in a relationship, even if it was a bad one.

I don’t kiss and tell. Heh.

I’m kidding, I’ll tell you. Girls I’ve called my girlfriend since I was like 16? Around 20. I’ve lost count. Not more than 30.

Glad you got some quality time with your dad. California is pretty nice. When are you thinking about visiting?

Hope you’re doing all right.

-Aaron

P.S. I’m not dealing with it. That woman isn’t old enough to have a kid your age.

Chapter 7

December

From: [email protected]

Date: December 1, 2008 5:05 a.m.

To: [email protected]

Subject: Get Over It

Aaron,

I talk to my brother about our e-mails sometimes, and he laughed when I told him your views on officers. He said, and I quote, “Nobody likes officers but other officers.”

My mom and sister are both beautiful. I don’t have any pictures of my mom’s mom. She didn’t like having her picture taken. I think she thought they stole your soul or something. She was a pretty old school from everything I’ve heard. I’m not even kidding. She died before I was born, but supposedly, she was a beauty queen. I don’t look anything like her. She’s got that red hair and mine decided it didn’t want to be red like hers or black like my dad’s, but I have closer to her coloring minus the freckles and inability to tan, and her eyes. I don’t look like either of my parents, more like both of them and neither one of them at the same time. My brothers call me “the milk man’s baby” because the rest of them look like one or the other, except me.

You guys had the Destruction Cookbook, didn’t you?

Thanks. I’m glad you liked my cosplay. With the exception of the Leeloo costume, I usually always do characters who have their faces covered. I don’t like being the center of attention. When I put the face paint on, it’s like I’m taking on the character and it makes me more outgoing, if that makes any sense. Like I’m not myself. It gives me a boost of confidence. That makes me sound like a weirdo, but it’s true.

Not that you’re asking, but I think you’re better off just living with the doubt. Unless you’re planning on getting back together, why torture yourself and get more pissed off? She did what she did, or she didn’t. Either way, I’m sorry. …do you want to get back together? Not judging, only asking.

You’re making me feel like an idiot. Here’s the thing: everyone knew I had feelings for this person. My entire family did. It wasn’t something I tried keeping a secret. I’d liked him my entire life. Besides fictional characters, he was the only person I had ever been in love with. Or at least, it felt like I was in love with him. I don’t know anymore. I’d like to blame it on just being young and dumb, but that seems like a cop out to say that. It was the classic in-love-with-your-older-brother’s-friend situation… except it was real life.