Rich People Problems Page 61

 

ALEXANDRA “ALIX” YOUNG CHENG

Youngest Daughter

I was in the library with Fiona and Kalliste, showing Kalliste my Enid Blyton first editions, when the dogs started howling. It must have been around half past three in the afternoon. It wasn’t just our pack of Alsatians that patrol the grounds, but it seemed like every dog within a two-mile radius was making restless, high-pitched yelps. I gave Fiona a look and she knew exactly what I was thinking. She left the library without a word and went upstairs to check on Mummy. By now the howling had stopped, but I remember feeling enveloped by a sense of dread. My heart was beating a mile a minute, and I kept staring at the door. I was somehow willing Fiona to not come back through those doors. I didn’t want to hear any bad news. I was trying to focus on Kalliste, who wanted to know if she could have the entire Malory Towers series—they were her favorites too when she was younger. Then Fiona came back in and I just froze until she smiled. “All’s well. Auntie Cat is with her,” she whispered to me. I was so relieved, and we went back to the stacks. About an hour later, Ah Ling came rushing into the library to tell me to get upstairs. The look on her face told me everything. You see, the dogs knew all along. They could sense it coming.

CASSANDRA SHANG

Niece

I was in bed at Harlinscourt, reading the latest Jilly Cooper novel when my phone began to vibrate on silent mode. I recognized the number immediately—it was Deep Throat, my spy at Tyersall Park. (Of course you knew I had an inside source at that house. It would be so foolish of me not to.) At first, Deep Throat simply said, “Boh liao.”* I said, “What do you mean boh liao?” Deep Throat was overly excited, but she managed to get it out: “Su Yi just died. Big fight upstairs right now. I must go.” So of course the first thing I did was call my father. I said, “Are you at Tyersall Park?” He said, “Er, no.” I think I caught him at his mistress’s apartment—he was very out of breath. So I said, “You better head over there now. Something just happened to your sister.”

 

LINCOLN “AH TOCK” TAY

Distant Cousin

Great-uncle Alfred called me. I think he was on his way to Tyersall Park. He said to tell everyone on my side of the family that Su Yi had just passed. But he didn’t want any of us at the house tonight. “Tell your father to stay home, and I’ll let you all know when to come. Tonight is just for the family.” As if we’re not part of the family, fucking bastard! Then he said, “Better start ordering the tents and folding chairs. We’re going to need a lot of them.” I was still at Irene Wu’s house trying to acclimate the damn fish back into the tank, so I told her the news and she started to lose it. “Oh no! Alamak! How to face Astrid?” she cried, fleeing to her bedroom. I went back into the living room and when I saw Astrid sitting there pouring tea like Princess Diana, I realized the spoiled bitch didn’t have a clue that her grandma had just kicked the bucket. Kan ni na, I had to be the one to tell her. Of course she was in total shock, but I don’t feel sorry for her one bit. She’s now instantly a million times richer than she already is.

VICTORIA YOUNG

Third Daughter

The first thing that came into my mind when I saw her lying there with Eddie crying over her body hysterically was: Thank you Jesus, thank you Jesus, thank you Jesus. She has been released, and so have I. I’m free at last. Finally free. I numbly put my hand on Alix’s back, and tried to rub it soothingly while she stood looking at Mummy. I thought I might cry, but I didn’t. I looked over at Cat, who was sitting in the armchair still holding Mummy’s hand, and she wasn’t crying either. She was just staring out the window with a rather odd look on her face. I suppose we must have all looked rather odd that day. I started to consider the curtains—Mummy’s curtains with the point d’Alençon lace trim, and I began to imagine how they would look in the front windows of the town house I would buy in London. I could really see myself moving to one of those lovely town houses in Kensington, perhaps on Egerton Crescent or Thurloe Square, just a stone’s throw from the Victoria and Albert. I would use the V&A’s glorious library every day, and go for afternoon tea at the Capital Hotel or the Goring. I’d attend All Souls Church every Sunday, and maybe even start my own Bible-study fellowship. I could endow a chair in theology at Trinity College, Oxford. Maybe I could even convert an old rectory in some charming town in the Cotswolds. Someplace with a particularly smart and handsome clergyman like that Sidney Chambers in Grantchester. Goodness me, one look at him in that stiff clerical collar and I go weak in the knees!

 

MRS. LEE YONG CHIEN

Chairwoman Emeritus of the Lee Philanthropic Foundation, Su Yi’s Mah-jongg Kaki

I was at my Friday-afternoon mah-jongg game at Istana with the First Lady, Felicity Leong, and Daisy Foo when Felicity got the call. She didn’t say anything to us at first—she just started rummaging through her Launer handbag, saying she needed to find her blood-pressure pills. Only after she had swallowed her pills did she say, “Ladies, I’m terribly sorry to leave like this in the middle of a game, but I must go. My mother has just passed.” My goodness, the First Lady became so overcome I thought she was going to faint right there at the table! After Felicity left, the First Lady said she should go upstairs to the office to tell the president the news, and Daisy said, “Alamak, I should call Eleanor! She didn’t call me, so I bet you she doesn’t know yet!” When the ladies all returned, we decided to toast Su Yi. After all, she was a mah-jongg maven par excellence. We all knew never to bet serious money when Su Yi was at the table. Now that she has left us, my money market account won’t feel the loss, but I know her family will. Su Yi was the glue that held them all together. Those children of hers are a disgrace. Philip is a simpleton, Alix is a useless Hong Kong tai tai, Victoria is a spinster, and the one that married the Thai prince, I never really knew her, but I always heard she was very stuck up, like most Thais I’ve met. They think just because they’ve never been invaded they are the best. Only Felicity has any sense, because she was the eldest. But all those grandchildren are also good-for-nothings. This is what happens when too much money falls on people who are too attractive. That Astrid, so pretty, but her only talent is spending more than the GDP of Cambodia on her clothes. Look at my grandsons. Four of them are doctors, three are lawyers—one is the youngest judge ever to be appointed to the Court of Appeal, and one is an award-winning architect. (Let’s not mention the grandson living in Toronto who is a hairdresser.) So sad for Su Yi, she can’t brag about any of her descendants. Just you watch, everything is going to go down the toilet now.

NICHOLAS YOUNG

Grandson

I had only just arrived at Tyersall Park and was unpacking my suitcases when I heard the commotion outside my bedroom. Maids were running down the corridors everywhere like a fire alarm had gone off. “What’s going on?” I asked. “Your Ah Ma!” one of them shouted frantically as she passed me. I immediately ran up the back stairs to Ah Ma’s bedroom. When I got there, I couldn’t see anything. There were too many people blocking the way, and someone was wailing uncontrollably. Victoria, Alix, Adam, and Piya were hovering around the bed while Uncle Taksin was embracing Auntie Cat, who was still sitting in the armchair beside Ah Ma. Ah Ling was closest to me by the door, and she turned toward me, her face swollen with tears. As Adam and Piya moved aside to make room for me, I could see that Eddie was lying in bed with Ah Ma, holding her body, shaking violently as he whimpered like a tortured animal. He caught my eye and suddenly, he leapt out of bed and started screaming, “You killed her! You killed her!” Before I knew what was happening, he’s on top of me and we’re both on the ground.

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